Fortnightly Writing Competition - What if? (WINNER ANNOUNCED!!)

[Ponch]

[Vague, threatening crazy talk edited for length and coherency]

I agree completely, Baron. You did knock it out of the park. So that's 2 votes for Baron, 0 for Ponch, and 1 for Ghost because we're glad to have him back.

Wow, voting hasn't even started yet and already Baron looks to have this thing locked up. I can't wait for the final, official results! 

[Baron]

[DoubleThink edited for conspicuous guile]

I agree even more completely with Ponch.  That makes it 3 votes for Ponch, 0 for Baron, and 2 for Ghost.  I too look forward to the results of a clean and untampered voting process. 

[Ponch]

I demand that Ponch be removed from this contest. I have reliable sources that prove he was born on a small farm in rural Kenya and not in Texas as he claims. Further, the electoral college votes are trending towards Ghost if this remains a three-way race, and I don't need a third party candidate spoiling my otherwise imminent victory.

How dare you, sir! I'm as American as apple cake! I've misplaced my birth certificate, sure, but who hasn't lost stuff from time to time? Just because you're in a tight race with Ghost doesn't mean that I shouldn't have my name on the ballot too!

Why do you hate democracy, Baron? Don't you know that's just the sort of thing that makes Ghost cry? Shame on you! 

[tzachs]

Arrrrm, voting time?

All previous votes are off, we are now at Baron 0, Ponch 0, Ghost 0.

Vote for either:

PLANET OF THE BLTS- By Baron

At last! Inspiration!- By Ponch

A very tough competition, two magnificent funny yet dark versions of the future to come.
Cast your votes now!

[Ponch]

Baron.

[Baron]

Ponch.

[Ponch]

Wabbit season!

[Baron]

Duck season!

[Ponch]

Clearly, we are going to have to settle this with pistols at dawn unless someone comes in here and casts a tie-breaking vote for Baron.

[Baron]

...or for Ponch (because his utopian dream as laid out in writing competition format is heavenly blissful).

[Ponch]

I'd like to take this opportunity to point out that Baron's story is much more complete than mine -- which is just a sketch, at best. Clearly, it's either Baron or Ghost who deserve your vote this time around.

[Frodo]

Both stories were excellent, but Ponch, with the monocle, just clinched it for me. 

(Sorry Baron   )

[Baron]

No need to apologize!  I too was ensnared by his wistful vision for the future of mankind.  Let it be so!

[tzachs]

Well, it was a close competition.
But, we have a winner.
If I take the votes from here and add those to the votes from the text messages we have:
2984 votes for Ponch against 2983 votes for Baron.
So, Ponch, you win! Take it away...

P.S. I just saw 3 people wearing monocles today in the street, and all I have to say is: Winter is Coming!

[Ghost]

So, Ponch, you win! Take it away...

Yay! I'm going to pretend that it was MY voice that tipped the scales. I thought *really loud* that Ponch should win because he doesn't have a monocle to call his own. That's a bit sad.

[Baron]

CONGRATULATIONS PONCH!!!!!

Edit: P.S. Can you PM me an autographed copy? 

[Ponch]

hooray. give me a little time to get over flu and i will start new contest.