Fortnightly Writing Competition: Choose Your Own Adventure (Results)

[Sinitrena]

Choose Your Own Adventure!

We‘re a forum focused on adventure games and we never had this topic? We need to change that!



So, what is a Choose-Your-Own-Adventure story?

This is a story where the reader is asked to make choices on how the story is supposed to continue and is then send to different pages of the story. That can mean he or she takes the role of a character (the story might be told in second person) and decides things like “Do you go left or do you go right?” It could also mean he or she decides in a more general sense (“Does the avalanche kill the characters or do they survive?”) or randomness is introduced and the reader decides by â€" for example â€" throwing a dice (“Roll a dice, on a 1-5 go to page 7, while on a 6 go to page 19.”) A variant is a story that asks facts about itself, for example: “What did Timmy see to make him realize who the thief is? a tire (page 3), a coin (page 1), a dog (page 23).”

Now, that sounds a lot like a text adventure, doesn't it? Well, it basically is, with the difference that in a Choose-Your-Own-Adventure story the narrative element should play a larger role than the gameplay element. Endless descriptions of what a room looks like and what inventory items the player can gather or how many exits there are for him or her to leave through make sense in a game, but not so much in a story. There is, obviously, a large amount of overlap, but for this competition narrative, plot and story elements should be on the forefront of your writing intentions. Every new paragraph should advance the story in some way.

That being said, gameplay elements are allowed, including dice-roles or the creation of a character with some kinds of stats, but no outside rule-sets. Requiring the reader to have a dice ready is fine, requiring him or her to own a copy of an AD&D rule book is not. The story is supposed to stand on its own and you need to explain all gameplay elements in the text somehow.

As for the length of this, I think to properly show your ability to write a branching story, the reader should make at least two choices. Two different choices at two points in the story can lead to the same paragraph, but I want to see at least some branching.

I highly recommend not waiting and posting the whole story at once but in paragraphs in different posts (I hope the moderators don't mind!) because it makes it easier to send the reader around (use links) and because this topic requires slightly longer entries over all than usual and might seem a bit overwhelming otherwise.

The story does not have to start at the beginning or have to come to a proper ending. It might come to an end in one branch but not in another, but every choice you give the reader does require the proper answering paragraph. (Does this make sense?)

As always, you have two weeks to come up with entries, but extensions are likely to be granted, especially for a topic like that. Official deadline: 18. February 2019 (extended 24. February!)

[Frodo]

This sounds interesting.   
It's been a while since I've entered a FTW, so let's give this a try.   


***************************************************************

THE CURIOUS CASE OF ANASTASIA CASTELLANOS

Somewhere in Ancient Greece, a fierce storm breaks over the misty moors…

A teenage girl runs through the moors… terrified… fleeing for her life.

She pants heavily, exhausted from running. But she can't stop.  She HAS to keep running. 

Her dark hair glistens in the rain. She's soaked through - the thin cape she's wearing over her embroidered silk dress offers little protection from the fierce storm.

She pauses for a moment. She looks at the ring she's wearing, and kisses it, then looks up at the dark sky.


GIRL: Osiris, I beseech thee… *pant pant* Please, hear my…


Voices are heard in the distance.


ADAMO: She MUST have come this way. She can't be too far ahead.

FABRIZIO: She can't escape!

ENZIO: She WON'T escape! If she does, we're all doomed.

MARCO: Not if we stop her. COME ON!


The girl glances back and sees fire from torches in the distance. The mob are gaining on her. She's terrified! But she can't let them catch her! She turns to flee again, but trips in the slippery mud. Frantically, she scrambles to her feet again. 




Will she escape?
Go HERE


Will the mob catch her?
Go HERE

[JudasFm]

Oh, now THIS is a great idea! I love interactive contests even more than regular ones

EDIT: However, sadly The Squid and I ran out of time even with the extension, so I'll be withdrawing my entry

[Frodo]

The next day, Gunthar arrives early at the library. The book has been on his mind all night. He takes it from the library shelf again, and flicks through to the right page. Yep, that picture is definitely Ana. But how is that possible? He intends to find out!

He takes the book, and makes his way up to the cliff edge, where he knows Ana likes to go. Sure enough, she's standing on the edge, looking out across the water.


GUNTHAR: YOU THERE!


Ana turns round, and sees Gunthar approaching her. And he seems even grumpier than usual.


ANA: Um… hello Gunthar.

GUNTHAR: *grabs her*  Don't ‘Hello' me. I want to know how you did it!

ANA: *puzzled* How I did what?

GUNTHAR: I know your secret! LOOK! *thrusts the open book at her* This is YOU in that painting, isn't it?


Ana gulps, and turns pale.


ANA: Don't be silly Gunthar. How can that be me? I'm only 18 years old. That painting was done in, when… *checks the date in the book* the 16th century?

GUNTHAR: You can't fool me, you know. I'm not stupid! I found this book when I was researching for MY book on local history. And THIS is what I found!  It's YOU in that painting, isn't it?  ISN'T IT!!!

ANA: *getting very nervous* That's not me, Gunthar. How can I make you believe me?

GUNTHAR: Then explain how she's the SPITTING IMAGE of you?

ANA: I don't' know. An ancestor, maybe? But come on, think about what you're saying.

GUNTHAR: Tell me the truth.  ADMIT IT! 


ANA: Gunthar, please?


Gunthar looms over her in a very threatening manner.




Will Ana deny that it's her painting in the book?
Go HERE


Will she confess all?
Go HERE

[Baron]

        Suddenly you are in some kind of under sea vehicle, and it is in desperately bad repair!  You struggle with the exit hatch, but the water pressure on the other side is too great for you to budge it.  Water sprays in through the joints in the walls, rising remorselessly in a frothy churn now reaching your waist.  There is not enough time.  You splash about, frantically searching for the talisman in the debris that litters the floor, but it does not want to be found.

        Then there is a steady tapping on the portal glass.  You turn, a sense of dread bubbling up faster even than the frigid water.  There is Katarina, blonde hair floating in whimsical tendrils in the ocean current, smiling serenely back at you through the glass.  You move to the tiny window and pound on it, the water already at your chest.  Katarina puts her hand up against the other side of the glass, revealing the golden chain snaking through her fingers and the jade talisman tangling teasingly below.  She tilts her head to the side, staring passively at your predicament.

You have just moments to process the full implications of this betrayal before you are submerged beneath the icy brine and are seized by the panicked throes of instinct.

You are dead

[Stupot]

Nice theme. I think I would use nested spoiler tags with different options in. Is that allowed, rather than hyperlinks?

[Sinitrena]

So many entries already  Keep them coming!

Nice theme. I think I would use nested spoiler tags with different options in. Is that allowed, rather than hyperlinks?

Of course it's allowed. I just thought different posts would be easiest to navigate.

[Frodo]

The girl closes her eyes for a moment, trying to make sense of the last 24 hours.  Why are these people hunting her?  She's a Royal Princess, after all.  Everyone loves her… don't they?  Her parents died when she was very young, and she's been raised by her Royal Advisor, who acted as Steward to the throne until Anastasia‘s 18th birthday, when she will inherit the throne.  Despite having no parents, she's led a privileged life until now. 

But that was before her trusted Royal Advisor told her about the curse - that when the first-born daughter of royal blood reaches her 18th birthday and inherits the throne, a curse would be unleashed, bring death and disease to Greece.  Then he betrayed her, and dragged her out to the mob. 

She doesn't believe in the curse, of course, but this is a small town, and superstition gives way to paranoia and fear.   



Voices from behind…


DARIO:   *calls out*   Oh, Prin…cess.   *whistles*   Here Princess, princess, princess. 

ENZIO:  She's not a dog, Dario.  She won't come just cos you call her. 

DARIO: Well what do you suggest then?  She turns 18 tomorrow.  And you KNOW what that means!   

ADAMO:  The curse!  She'll invoke the curse!  And then, we're ALL doomed! 

MATTIA:    Princess Anastasia CANNOT reach her 18th birthday.  COME ON!  LET'S STOP HER! 


Anastasia starts running through the moors again.  She's exhausted, but she MUST keep going if she wants to survive.   

She jumps, as a crash of thunder beats down.  Then a flash of lightning lights up the dark sky, revealing the edge of the moors, giving way to a sharp drop.  She can hear the crash of waves far below her.  There's nowhere for her to run. 

Minutes later, the angry mob catch up to Princess Anastasia.  She's kneeling in the muddy grass, holding her ring up to the sky, praying to her god, Osiris. 




ANASTASIA: Osiris, won't you hear my prayer?  Osiris, take me far from here.   *pause*   OSIRIS!  OSIRIS!  HEAR MY PLEA!  OBEY ME! 

FABRIZIO:   *catches up to her*   Osiris won't save you now, Princess! 


The mob close in on her.  Her screams as they begin to beat her and kick her, remain ignored.  Then she feels a sharp pain as a blade cuts into her.  She feels herself growing colder, as a pool of blood gathers around her.  Minutes pass, but it feels like ours.  Then her screams fall silent.  She's gone. 


LORANZO:   *to the mob*   We stopped the curse!  We won!  HURRAY! 

MOB:  HURRAY!   *cheers* 


Satisfied their work is done, the mob gradually disperse, going back to their own lives, leaving the body of their forsaken Princess lying on the moors, for everyone to see.   

The End.

[WHAM]

I need to do a bit of escapism, and spending a night or two forcing myself to do some creative writing seems like a solid option.
I'll start work on something tonight.

Is it acceptable to store the story and its elements off-site, or does the content of the story need to be located on the AGS Forums themselves?

[Sinitrena]

Is it acceptable to store the story and its elements off-site, or does the content of the story need to be located on the AGS Forums themselves?

I can't really force you to post it here directly and only linking to it is not a reason to disqualify an entry, but I would very much prefer it here. There are enough people who don't like to click on any kind of external link.

[WHAM]

My idea was to post the first part here, then have links to my website for the options in the story. These would lead to simple HTML pages with the next part and next options, making the story easier to follow and harder to accidentally spoil by reading the wrong part.

[cat]

But whenever your website goes down, it is gone. If you post it here, this cannot happen.

[WHAM]

I'll back it up in my google drive, as with all my FWC entries (see my signature). After voting I can also dump the whole thing here as well.

[cat]

A to B

It's Monday morning and you just boarded a commuter train to get to work. A comfortable warmth surrounds you which is quite a contrast to the cold platform where you have been waiting just a few seconds ago. As the door closes behind you with a squeal, you take off your woollen hat and stow it in your bag. You hold on to a pole while the train starts to accelerate.

The train is reasonably filled with tired looking people - listening to music, playing on their phone, reading a book or just sitting there with a vacant look on their face.


You spot two empty seats. Where do you want to sit down?

A single window seat next to the door
Go to Cannon Street

An aisle seat in a group of four seats further into the train
Go to South Kensington

[WHAM]

EDIT: Removing this entry and reposting later, as I've encountered the post character limit. ->

[cat]

Continuing A to B
Please start reading the story here: https://www.adventuregamestudio.co.uk/forums/index.php?topic=56878.msg636601694#msg636601694

Spoiler

You walk a few meters until you reach a group of four seats. You sit down on the empty aisle seat facing the front of the train.

Next to you sits a man in his forties, wearing a tidy but unremarkable grey business suit, that perfectly matches the colour of his hair. He is working on a laptop that is standing on a small table mounted beneath the window.

The other window seat is occupied by a young woman in her early twenties. Under her crocheted hat and brown curly hair, you see cables of earphones appear and then again vanish in the pocket of her jacket. She is leaning against the window with her eyes closed.

Directly opposite you is sitting a middle-aged woman with a large leather handbag placed on her lap. She is reading one of those free newspapers you get at train stations. You don't see much of her face or upper body besides a few massive golden rings distributed over the fingers of both hands, holding the newspaper. Whenever she turns a page you grasp a look at her black-dyed hair and heavy make-up.



What do you do?


Peak at the laptop next to you
Go to Baker Street

Read what you can see of the woman's newspaper
Go to Tottenham Court Road

Start playing "Annoyed Poultry" on your phone
Go to Liverpool Street

[close]

[Baron]

I'm just thinking out loud here, but I *might* need an extra week to completely flesh out all the possible paths in this one. 

-------------------

The Dream-Roving Dalliance

   The clinical chirping of hospital instruments bores deep into your ears as you grasp Katarina's comatose hand.  Her face is half-bruised, and the other half is bandaged.  Her blonde hair is matted, the vibrant colour somehow draining away over her long days of decline.  Beneath the abrasive smell of sterility there is the faintest whiff of decay.

   You turn to the ancient Mind-Melder who is sitting pensively on the other side of Katarina's bed.    Her face is deeply wrinkled, but her eyes are bright as gemstones.  “The nurses whisper about Katarina circling the drain, and the doctors won't give me the time of day,” you confide.  “They will only talk to next-of-kin, but they haven't been able to find any.”

   â€œHave you known her long?” the Mind-Melder asks in a slow, measured tone.

   You instinctively reach for the bruises on your own face.  “No,” you say flatly.  “We had just met before the accident.”

   â€œIt is dangerous without a real connection,” the Mind-Melder muses.  “Quite dangerous.”

   â€œI don't care.  It's her only chance.”

   â€œProbably...”

   â€œPut me in,” you say.

   The grating beeps of the monitors count out the long seconds of silence between you.

   â€œThere are things you need to understand,” the Mind-Melder says.

   â€œI think I understand,” you say impulsively.

   â€œThen there are some things that bear repeating,” the Mind-Melder sighs.  “First, you will be dream-roving in a world of melded-minds, which can be unstable even in the best of circumstances.”

   â€œI know that,” you say impatiently.

   â€œI will hypnotize you,” the Mind-Melder continued.  “And as a part of your hypnosis I will plant trigger symbols to help you interpret the dream-scape.  First, you need a means of egress.  Some sort of trinket that you can recognize that will pull you out if you get into trouble.”

   You point at the jade talisman hung around Katarina's neck on a golden chain.

   â€œNext, you need another symbol to help you identify an axon chute.”

   â€œA what?”

   â€œAn axon chute,” she explains.  “In our own dreams the consciousness skips from scenario to scenario when it collides with an axon chute.  It can be anything: a doorway, an object.  You need a way of recognizing them in order to navigate the dream-scape.  Some sort of symbol.”

   â€œThis,” you say, indicating the ace of spades tattoo on your lower arm.

   â€œAlright.  Now listen carefully.  When you insert you will need to find the avatar of Katarina's consciousness as quickly as possible.  And then you will need to find the jade talisman.  While grasping her hand in one of yours and the jade talisman in the other there is a chance that you can drag her back into this world.”

   â€œOK.”

   â€œBut there is a chance that she is already too far gone to produce an avatar...” the Mind-Melder warns.

   â€œI know that.”

   â€œAnd there is a chance that she might not trust a stranger,” the Mind-Melder continues, her wrinkled brow furrowing further as she arched an eyebrow.

   â€œI know that too.”

   â€œVery well.  If you get into trouble you will need to grasp the jade talisman alone.  You will awaken, but I'm afraid the strain of a second attempt will be too much for the young lady's mind given her current condition.  In such a scenario she will likely be lost forever.”

   â€œI understand.”

   â€œYou must be quick,” the Mind-Melder goes on in a more hushed tone.  “Oh so very quick.  For there are things that lurk in the subconsciousness that are free to roam rampant when the consciousness fails.  Dark things.  Nightmares from another time, passed down through the generations like a genetic disease.  Some of us bear more of them than others, but in the young lady's state they will be free, and they will be hungry.  They go by many names, but the oldest is the Sgruck.  It should go without saying, but if you should die as you dream-rove you will never find the talisman...”

   â€œAnd I will never wake up,” you conclude.

   â€œAnd if you rove for too long then the talisman will fade from your consciousness, and you will be trapped forever in your melded nightmare.

   â€œI understand the risks.  Put me in,” you say again.  Katarina seems to fade more with every passing minute.

   â€œHave you not been listening to my words?” the Mind-Melder whispers, the soft sounds echoing as if through a tunnel.  The beeps of the instruments have somehow faded to the primal thumping of blood rushing through conduits.  You feel dizzy and disembodied all at the same time.  “It is time to choose,” the all pervasive whisper echoes.  “Will you find her in walls or beyond them?”

   You try to look into Katarina's face for a clue, but there is nothing now but a black void.  The first pangs of self-doubt stab into your mind, but you suppress them ferociously.  You may have barely known her, but there was a connection with the golden girl in the seat next to you before the crash.  You just need to trust in your instincts to reconnect with her in her hour of need.  So what do you choose?

If you choose within walls, turn to PAGE 2

If you choose beyond walls, turn to page PAGE 19

[WHAM]

Just a quick remark as I put the finishing touches on my project here: holy hell, Sinitrena, this has been a HUGE undertaking to keep sensible!
I'm not sure what I've made here, but it's a monstrosity I can barely control!

[Sinitrena]

Just a quick remark as I put the finishing touches on my project here: holy hell, Sinitrena, this has been a HUGE undertaking to keep sensible!
I'm not sure what I've made here, but it's a monstrosity I can barely control!

I... kind of warned you...   

I highly recommend not waiting and posting the whole story at once but in paragraphs in different posts (I hope the moderators don't mind!) because it makes it easier to send the reader around (use links) and because this topic requires slightly longer entries over all than usual and might seem a bit overwhelming otherwise.

I'm just thinking out loud here, but I *might* need an extra week to completely flesh out all the possible paths in this one. 

A week seemes a bit long, but as it looks like not a single story is finished just yet and I don't want to rush you all, I extent the deadline by 3 days (for now) until 21. February.

[cat]

Continuing A to B
Please start reading the story here: https://www.adventuregamestudio.co.uk/forums/index.php?topic=56878.msg636601694#msg636601694

Spoiler

The breaks of the train squeak as it arrives at your station. When it finally comes to a halt, the doors open automatically. You leave the train and continue your way to work.


The end.

[close]